Two nights ago an evil, and feared enemy entered our household. My brother decided that this invasion meant war and recruited me into the ranks of our home's defense army. And so my brother and I declared war on the invading spider. What!? Don't laugh! It was a big ass spider and it was chilling on our ceiling not giving a fuck and ready to pounce on us at any moment.
And so my brother and I armed ourselves bring a very long feather duster and got ready to go into battle. Once in position my brother attacked, but the spider immediately went on the offensive and charged at us. Luckily we were able to hold it off but at the cost of our weapon breaking. And so the task fell to me to use our broken feather duster to banish the enemy from our house. After a difficult and hard battle I had beaten the spider to the open backdoor and kicked it outside. It tried to get back in but I beat it back, taking a limb. Once it was once outside I threw its limb outside and gave it a warning: "You tried to come back in and you lost a limb, next time it will be your life!".
It has been two days and the spider has not returned. My brother and I have declared the battle a victory, but the war still goes on...
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